Dear Vons Cookies,
Why are you so delicious? Why do I feel the need to eat one, or two, or three of you after each and every meal including breakfast?
You’re kind of breakfasty right?
No.
You are delectable though! If I could marry a cookie I would marry you.
No prenup. Promise.
Karla

Dear Vons,
PLEASE STOP selling these delicious cookies. I BEG OF YOU!
I am gaining 4 lbs a week purely because of these treats.
I bought 2 boxes this past trip. I live alone.
Many thanks,
Karla

Dear Karla,
CONTROL YOURSELF!
Karla FattyBoBatty

Yes, my friends. This was my dinner tonight. The most delicious Cookies on Earth and a giant glass of cheap Chianti.